Keeping My Head Up
This picture sort of captures how I feel:
Being in the current situation that I am in, most people say:
“You’ll Find a Job”
“Keep Your Head Up”
“Things will work out”
All encouraging words, all seem nice. However some days it is hard to keep the same attitude, a positive attitude. If you ask the boyfriend he will tell you I am not very positive most of the time, and it is true. I try not to be so negative, but I am very hard on myself and my work. I want everything I do to be at a certain standard, and when it is not, even if it is, I want to keep bettering myself. Usually I am in a situation where I can, but currently I need to work just as hard to have an opportunity as much as I need to work on improving myself. It gets tiring and it gets very discouraging. The one thing I can rely on right now is my very supportive boyfriend and family. If I did not have them, I would be out on the street, and I would have much more depression to deal with then I do currently. No worries I am not too terribly off, I have just been putting in a lot of effort for little or no results. And when I get a glimmer of hope, something happens where I have to work even harder to get to see the actual glimmer.
I want to have a print shop, I want to have a photo studio, I want to establish myself. However it is hard to do that when I have no place to do that right now. Especially when I am planning to move 600+ miles in the next few months.
I guess in times like these you just need to be thankful for what you have. I am thankful for my family, my boyfriend, my health (that I am improving upon), my car, my bicycles, my cameras, and a roof as well as food (maybe too much food sometimes).